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Like A Bird Of The Night, Feel My Tears As They Dry

For some reason I feel as though this post needs to be shared with the world. The ignorance in the initial post is just heartbreaking. The reason why the following photos just get the best of me is because of my little story.







(This is the shortened version of the 35 comments.)

Throughout the past couple of years,  I realized that I suffer from depression. It’s not as severe as cases as most are, but one day it got the best of me. In 2011, I began to hate myself. I was insecure from the build up of the years before from being picked on and loosing friendships and not understanding why. It hurts. I was in a relationship at the time, and he would put me down and that only added to my depression. I wasn’t happy and I just wanted to escape. I ended the relationship because fortunately, I could tell I wasn’t in a stable mindset and I needed happiness. A couple of months later I entered another relationship and this was the longest relationship I’ve ever had. I thought this was someone I could trust to never abandon or disappoint me. I was wrong. Even throughout the relationship, I felt lonely. I ate alone a lot in school and that made me feel like something was wrong with me. I would try to make friends with new people, but no one tried to make friends with me. What was wrong with me?

So when the relationship ended (in 2013) with a bunch of lies and cheating… I was a very empty person. I couldn’t eat for days and I resorted to alcohol. I did meet new friends through the course of my emptiness, and if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t be here. While I enjoyed their company, the pain was tearing me apart. It probably didn’t help that I added a lot of drinking to the mix and a rebound guy. One night at a party, I got really drunk. I hit my foot on my friend and it broke my toe nail. And I broke down in tears. I wasn’t crying over the toe nail… I was crying because I felt horrible. I wanted to escape. So I asked for a bath. and then I asked if they would leave me alone. I was going to die that night. I was going to drown myself. But my friend stayed… they don’t know that was my intentions… and I’m now thankful for them not leaving my side. They saved my life without knowing it.

This is why this post irks me. YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND WHAT ITS LIKE TO CRY AT NIGHT AND PRAY TO DIE! It is a dark, terrible place. I was able to pull myself out of that hole… and it’s still a struggle, but I am strong enough to carry on now. Unfortunately, some people aren’t. Some people have a more severe case of depression. A more lack of serotonin. It’s a real disease that is hard to cure. And this post just makes it seem like they don’t care. What if someone who had this disease takes it as a case of someone not caring about them taking their life? You can’t post stuff like this, opinion or not. It’s more complicated of a subject than that and until you are the one staring down the end of a barrel… quite frankly you can shut the hell up!

Rest in Peace, Robin Williams. You were a great man. You made people laugh and you made people love. I’m saddened that you couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’m saddened that this terrible disease took the best of you. God bless your family and friends through this rough time.

Also, God bless anyone who has ever felt like killing themselves, or has experienced a loved one kill themselves.

I know it may seem like the world only cares when a celebrity does something like this, but maybe it’s a wake up call. Suicide is not a topic to take lightly. Raise awareness. Save Lives.

With love,

Princess Emilia

“Kiss her. Slowly, take your time, there’s no place you’d rather be. Kiss her but not like you’re waiting for something else, like your hands beneath her shirt or her skirt or tangled up in her bra straps. Nothing like that. Kiss her like you’ve forgotten any other mouth that your mouth has ever touched. Kiss her with a curious childish delight. Laugh into her mouth, inhale her sighs. Kiss her until she moans. Kiss her with her face in your hands. Or your hands in her hair. Or pulling her closer at the waist. Kiss her like you want to take her dancing. Like you want to spin her into an open arena and watch her look at you like you’re the brightest thing she’s ever seen. Kiss her like she’s the brightest thing you’ve ever seen. Take your time. Kiss her like the first and only piece of chocolate you’re ever going to taste. Kiss her until she forgets how to count. Kiss her stupid. Kiss her silent. Come away, ask her what 2+2 is and listen to her say your name in answer.”

Azra.T “this is how you keep her” (via 5000letters)


(via adorable-lesbians)

(via athousandyearssss)

“I said I would go to hell for you, but I didn’t expect you to leave me there.”

a sentence or two: a series, by psycheo (x)

(via dopeeaddicted)

<3 Hello. My name is Emilia Roy and I'm going to be famous. 20.

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